satanworshipmoved:

(via chellstardis)

skittlesndrpepper:

craigmothertucker:

so my 16 year old brother made himself a balloon son and kept a photo album of their day together here it is

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you my boyfriend and his outstanding level of maturity.

(via chellstardis)

theweepyfox:

geometricdeathtrap:

So I needed a way to alert the class that I was going to be showing graphic pictures of genitals on my presentation so I decided that putting this on the slide before would work

I want this on a shirt.

(via wafflemurderer)

alongcameatom:

SO ACCORDING TO ANCESTRY.COM MY ANCESTORS HELPED SET UP AND RAN THE FIRST WHORE HOUSE IN THE NEW WORLD.
YOU’RE WELCOME

(via chellstardis)

mytoecold:

A guy I don’t know very well handed me his yearbook and asked me if I wanted to sign it. 

I said yes, and shortly after he added, “Just don’t write anything gay.”

I wrote this:

Fuck my actual butthole. You are a boy and so am I. We are going to have sex that is gay. Pound my rock hard cock and bite me.

Love,

Drew 

(via chellstardis)

leftforbed:

leftforbed:

mcsnuggie:

true self control is waiting until the movie starts to eat your popcorn

why would the movie eat my popcorn

nevermind i get it

(via jakemalik)